Most of us long to belong, but we settle for
fitting in. We want community, but
struggle to balance our uniqueness with the group’s need
for unity. Plus, community is made up of
people, and have you been around people recently? Martin Luther in the 16th Century
said that humans are both beloved and broken, saint and sinner, marvelous and
messy, exhilarating and exhausting.
Community can both shape our soul with help/healing and hurt. When has this been true for you? When do you feel a twinge in a meeting, or
your stomach/soul somersault when talking to family/friends? Groups have personality, energy, and
influence that shape us. We are
hardwired to seek community and connection. Genesis 2 is about the first human longing for a
companion. God said, “It is not good
that the human should be alone; I will make the earthling a helper and partner.” (Genesis 2:18). Pause with me: who is a helper and partner
for you right now?
As Dr. Curt Thomason says, our becoming and
belonging are intertwined. Who we become
is impacted and influenced by who we are connected to. Your mom was right: be careful who your
friends are. People shape us positively
and negatively. People can bless us or
bring the sharp shards of their brokenness into our lives. Unfortunately, the software in our brains
tends to ruminate on the negative. Pain
sticks to us like Velcro, while joy can roll off us like Teflon. We can tend to recall the wounds or losses
easily, but forget the love or severely discount it. Scientists say we developed the trait of
flight, fight, freeze, flock, and fawn because it is what protected us out in
the wilderness. Our ancestors needed to
know if that rustling in the nearby bushes was a lion licking its lips at you
as lunch or if it was a harmless squirrel trying to find its next meal. That reality persists and pervades our lives
today. Research suggests that when we
see negative news, our brains convince us that the event can/even will happen
to us, so you better keep your guard up.
Your body has a collection of bruises.
You also have open memories; when you recall that experience, you still
feel the heartbreak and soul ache. Of
course, open memories can be good and still cause us to laugh at an awkward
experience from decades ago. Again, we
tend to cling to the brokenness rather than the blessedness. As we wrap up and wind down 2026, it is holy
to look back, look around, and look forward.
This week, I encourage you to write down moments that gave
you energy and ones that drained your energy. This is going to take some time. There is no due date for this
assignment/invitation/prayer practice.
You could be well into 2027 before the fog around something you are
carrying clears. Yet, to set aside time
to be with God in this is holy. Please
feel free to reach out to me to talk more about such holy reflections. I pray this week that the saints who hover
and hum continue to infuse and inspire your life. We are part of a great cloud of witnesses,
and you are part of someone else’s cloud as well. May God’s love, peace, presence, and
possibility hold and enfold you each day.
Amen.
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