Worry

 

A prayer for those who are worry-warts (like me)

God, I know Jesus said, do not worry, but I am so good at it!!  I have practiced worrying and have it down to an art.  My mind can create thousands of fictional future problems that I race off to solve, even though they may never happen.  I have convinced myself that my worry is productive, like sitting in a rocking chair and expecting to go somewhere.  That while I may not have to outrun a lion out in the wilderness, I can plan and plot and be prepared like a good Christian scout.  Deep down, I want You to notice all my hard work.  God, I confess my own salvation projects.  God, I name and notice my fear for my family, and that I don’t get to decide what they do.  God, I name and notice my concerns for the church, that trying to lead people can be like herding cats.  And too often I take too much responsibility and accountability for that which is not mine.  God, I name and notice my anger at culture that wounds and hurts and how I think I can be a superhero to save the day.  God slow me down.  God make me human size.  God stop my striving to be still…to be (see Morning Mediation from Wednesday).  Let Your love get a word in edgewise and write a gospel on my heart and life, my calendar and credit card, on this holy, unknown and uncontrollable day.  For here I am, God.  Here You are, God.  Here we are together.  May these three sentences be the wisdom I need every hour, every second, this day.  Amen.