In
Matthew 18:21-22, Jesus talks (briefly) about forgiveness. And yet, these two verses could take hours to
unpack and even a lifetime to live out. What do you think about forgiveness? What have you heard from pastors or books or
others on this topic? Is forgiveness
forgetting the past or setting down the hurt so you don’t keep dragging it
around, even though you will always bare the scar the words/actions of another
caused? Is forgiveness one and done, or
a process of slowly releasing the heartbreak that takes time ~ months or years? I wonder if Jesus says seventy-seven times
because the number seven was seen as a complete number – echoing the number of
days of creation ~ maybe Jesus is talking about the completeness of forgiveness
– which might take longer? Or maybe that
is a literal number when someone hurts and harms you it is going to take energy
and effort to let that go, like more than seventy-seven times!
Everett
L. Worthington, Jr. has written a lot about forgiveness (Google his name and
you’ll find some of his resources). He
asks us to consider the what of forgiveness, the who
of forgiveness, the how and the when. We will be doing some more work with this in
the coming year. For now, think about what
pains/hurts/aches have you been carrying around with you? Who caused that pain? How can you imagine setting that down? When do you hope to do that? For example, I am very upset with something
an extended family member said to us this summer. I’ve been holding it (feeding that flame of
anger with firewood and fanning it into a bonfire) for the last few
months. I can picture the person who
said this. I work at letting go of the
power that comment has in my life, because I have tried to talk to the person,
and I would have been better off talking to the wall in front of me. I can’t change people ~ I can barely change
myself. How can I set it
down? For me, I do this moment by
moment, day by day. This process is slow
and intentional and prayerful ~ two steps forward and ninety-nine
backwards. It is hard/holy work, which
is why we keep tending the fire of anger and outrage, it is just easier. I would love to talk to you more about
forgiveness, I think it is one of the most important faith topics today. I encourage you to spend time today
reflecting on where you might be called to forgive and where you might be
praying someone will forgive you too! As
you do, two quotes to ponder. “On our
own strength, we are not capable of really forgiving, especially if it concerns
deep hurt. Forgiving is the most divine
thing we do. It is the completion of
love. When we notice that we cannot yet
forgive, we might be care not to blame ourselves or get discouraged, so long as
there is a sincere desire to grow toward forgiveness.” Peter van Breeman. “We are supposed to forgive everyone;
everyone includes (maybe starts) with ourselves.” Denis Waitley. Amen.
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