Cleaning our theological closet

 

We are exploring the gaps we often have between our beliefs and experiences, the expectations we have about our faith.  Steve Cuss in his book, The Expectation Gap writes, “I am not some mystical faith guru.  There is no Yoda in me, I am an earth (human size) vessel.”  Part of what creates a gap between beliefs and experiences is our assumptions.  I can intellectually know that God loves me, but I can assume that God’s love is conditional on my next sermon or blog post or making people happy (which is next to impossible).  You have assumptions about God that when those ideas come into the light of day for the sake of your soul, there can be healing.  To be sure, we may not want to do this.  We don’t want to do this because we all have a bit of imposture syndrome.  We tend to believe that everyone else has a neat and tidy theology ~ even though we don’t!  If you look in my theological closet it is a mess of messages from my childhood that are still there like my safety patrol badge that I have for no good reason.  I have remnants of religion that were passed on from my grandmother and I can’t bear part with it, even though it doesn’t really go with my faith today.  I have leftovers from Sunday School that I are at once outgrown, but I don’t let go of them, no matter how many candles are on my birthday cake.  We are all a combination and conglomeration of past, present, and future that can feel a bit chaotic.  If we think cleaning a closet where we have shoved parts of our life is demanding, so too is cleaning out our theological understandings.  One way to do this is to think about what you heard about God as a child.  Was God angry or judgmental or always watching to make sure you colored inside the lines?  Was God absent, not talked about, seen as something only foolish people would talk about?  Was God loving and warm like your grandmother’s hugs as she served you piping hot from the oven chocolate chip cookies?  Was God distant and disconnected, a Being to be avoid and that you didn’t want to get God’s attention?  Was God an invisible Spirit to appease or please with your good behavior?  What messages did your 8-year-old self-learn about God?  And how might that still be part of the operating system in your faith?  The good news of great joy is that we don’t have to jettison or deny this part of ourselves, we can embrace God who was understood one-way years ago and is doing new things in our life right here and now.  May our expanding and elastic God continue to find ways to be within you in the gaps between what you believe and experience/encounter in these days.