Hymnal of our Soul Part 6

 

We are continuing to explore the pages of the holy hymnal that lives, breathes, and moves within us.  Yesterday, I asked you to read slowly, prayerfully ponder, the words of one hymn from your list.  Today, I want to introduce you to a new hymn, A Hymn for Self-Acceptance by Wesley King.  This is part of a new hymnal by the Hymn Society, and we will be singing these words during PRIDE month in June.  I invite you to read these words aloud.  Yes, I do mean this!  Please say each word as if God is singing, speaking, whispering the word to you.

 

When you feel change might be hopeless, when you’ve given up on God.

When you feel you’re not worth saving, that your being-ness is flawed.

When your prayers still seem unanswered, not a sound from the Divine,

Maybe you have been mistaken.  God is sending you a sign.

 

I love how this verse begins with an honest lament that we get flustered and frustrated with God.  We walk (or run away) from the Holy, often because “religious” people and systems don’t want to accept or affirm our experiences and encounters of the Eternal.  I love that we can sing about times we give up on God and at the same time acknowledge God doesn’t give up on us.  Notice in the second line of the poem shines a light on the inner critic who wants to tell me that I am not worth saving.  The church has preached transactional theology for so long.  Just be a “good” person to earn badges for your eternal salvation sash.  We skip over Genesis 1 and 2, that YOU are created and crafted in God’s goodness.  We jump right to talking about our flaws and faults and failures.  Or more likely, we point out “others” whose flaws are even worse than ours.  The third line is equally powerful ~ that the silence of God can be deafening.  The further we run from God; the softer God’s voice can be.  And we also know that there is nowhere God is not.  God is a circle whose circumference extends beyond the furthest galaxy and whose center is right where you are.  When we are exhausted from running, proving, arguing, and punching our way to peace, maybe that is when we fall flat on the ground sobbing.  In this moment, we remember anew that at the end of our rope is God’s address. 

 

Friends, keep praying the words of the hymns that are sacred to you.  Keep scanning the hymnal of your heart and even stop by the church to look through the one in the pews.  Search for new hymns (the Hymn Society is a great place to start).  It is my prayer you will continue to let your life flow on in endless song above the lamentations that are honest/heartfelt and there is a new creation being crafted by our still creating God.  Amen.