Eight Words for Love Part One

 

This month we’ve been reflecting on the word, “love”.  In many ways, our use (or overuse) of this word in English puts too much weight upon those four little letters.  After all, there is a distinction between my love for ice cream and the love for my family.  Moreover, we tend to describe or define love as sentiment, even syrupy or sappy, rather than the source of our being.  Perhaps we could take a lesson from our Greek brothers and sisters who have eight different words for love. 

 

Who knew you were going to learn so much when you started reading the Morning Meditation this morning?  What are those eight words, I imagine you saying to me.  I am delighted you asked!

 

In Greek there is eros love, this is passionate and physical love.  It is that moment of butterflies in the stomach, head over heels, and our brains flooding our bodies with all kinds of feel-good chemicals.  There is a logical, reasonable explanation why you can’t help but smile after those first few dates of falling in love.  Your mind is sending out all kinds of dopamine and serotonin, giving you all the “feels”.  In some ways, this is the kind of love our current culture overemphasizes and idealizes.  It is also the kind of love that can fade or fizzle because of the energy (physically and emotionally) it takes to sustain.

 

Then there is philia or friendship love.  I love how our Celtic brothers and sisters give us the phrase, “anam cara” meaning “soul friend”.  This was the person you could share your inner-most self with, the one you let into the cobweb corners of your heart that you aren’t sure are really lovable.  Our soul friend is the one we haven’t seen in a few months but pick up the conversation comfortably right where we left off as if no time had passed.  This kind of love is important because it is where you are seen fully for who you are and see others fully.

 

Then there is ludus or playful love.  This is a connection where we just enjoy each other.  Think of two kids who meet on the playground for the very first time, become fast friends, spend all afternoon running around and laughing, and hug each other tightly when it is time to go.  Those two children may never see each other again, but for that moment they shaped each other’s life.  They enjoyed the moment.  We need more playful love.  It is also a love of the present moment and seeing the holiness of sharing that moment with another.  There is a joyful innocence in this kind of love that can warm your heart and remind you of our shared humanity.

 

Then there is agape love, which you probably have heard in a sermon or two.  This is selfless love.  C.S. Lewis called it “gift love” that expects nothing in return.  Agape love can be found when we volunteer our time.  We don’t do it for an award or recognition, but because our hearts beckon us to share and shine our light.  Agape love says life is not just about me.  It is the kind of love that Jesus described on the last night of his life that is the way to serving others.

 

We push pause on the list today for you to ponder these four pathways of love.  More importantly, is there a person you could name right now who you have a ludus love for?  A person with whom you are always laughing?  Or what about an “Anam cara” who is that soul friend?  We are blessed by some people in our lives who offer us love in more than one of the ways described, defined for love.  For today, let the playful, soul-filled, gift-giving love of God enter into your life in holy ways.