Metaphorically, we all have a bit of Javert within us...places where like the flower above we are closed, not ready to open. We swim in a sea of this reality as politically we are more polarized. We swim in a sea of this reality where we force ourselves to form an opinion quickly and defeat that position no matter what. We push down pain to places deep within and sweep brokenness under the rugs of our soul.
I know this to be true for me, so I am compelled by Javert and how he holds a mirror up to my own fastidious and frantic ways I can cling to my way or the highway.
The reality is that the flower up above did open.
The reality is that which we push down will eventually boil up.
The reality is that moment can break us open or make us bitter.
While I try to not be dualistic or get trapped by either or thinking, the truth is that often times my own frustration that I push down and put on a happy face will eventually come out to play ~ often at the most inopportune times hurting others.
I recently had a moment where I was on a call and felt the tiny vein in my neck start to pulse. The conversation quickly took an exit ramp to Disaster-ville. Things were said. Emotions raw were displayed. My stomach felt upset for the rest of the day. With grace and more conversation, the relationship was repaired. But that does not always happen. Sometimes a window does close and no door opens. Sometimes the new normal is life without that connection that is closed off.
So, what truth is stirring within you?
What do the thoughts above awaken within you?
Can there be a trace of grace moving in your midst nudging you in new ways?
To own my inner-Javert and make peace with him, that is my prayer today.
Blessings ~~
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