Velcro and Teflon

Recently I was reading a blog post by Rick Hanson (click here to read) who was describing the negativity bias that seems to be baked and built into our brains...I guess to make life more interesting??

Basically the hard wiring in our minds is like Velcro for negative experiences, but Teflon for positive ones.  This is great when we are in survival mode.  We want to remember what we heard/smell/ saw and felt right before we encountered that bear a few days ago.  We want to learn from the time we got too close to the fire.  We need to hold onto what we said that hurt another person's feelings. 

But why do we let go of the positive experiences so quickly? 

Maybe there just isn't enough storage space.
Maybe we think that we don't always deserve the positive moments - haven't earned them - although, we will probably never feel like we've earned them.
Maybe you were raised by parents like mine who wanted to make sure I didn't boast or brag too much...because, "No one likes someone who gloats".  I am not sure this is true any more.
Maybe...just maybe...we don't know why we down play the good.

For me, this reality can play itself out at the age old tradition of the pastor standing at the door at the end of the service.  First, quick exit ramp, why is this a thing?  Our amazing organist doesn't do this on Sunday.  But there I am standing there...just waiting for people to shake my hand...like I am a politician running for office.  But it is amazing how often people make comments.  I hear about someone's upcoming surgery I didn't know about.  I hear about prayer concerns...or meet someone's nephew in for a visit...and of course, I hear comments on the sermon.  At the door is where I get someone's thumbs up or thumbs down...and have to wonder if the person who is skipping the line and I thought I saw rolling his eyes at me during the sermon is mad...or just really wants to get next door for a cookie and coffee that has been brewing now for hours. 

I digress.

I think we need to velcro the good in life too.  I am reminded of this in Paul's letter to the Philippians chapter 2.  He starts off by listing all these good qualities and characteristics.  The laundry list is not as long as some other places in Paul's literary career.  In fact, at only 5 verses, actually kind of short when you compare it to Paul's description of love in 1 Corinthians 13...that one always leaves me hearing the words with the Mission Impossible theme playing in the back of my mind. 

And while my initial reaction is that I can't always love people...or be in the same spirit and mind with them...or not act out of selfish ambition but being humble always.  But the point isn't to see all the times I tried and failed, but to notice and name those moments when I felt the spirit stirring and encountered this truth.  There are moments love makes my heart, like the Grinches', grow three sizes in one day.  There are moments I feel closely connected to others ~ who I may not agree with.  There are moments in the stumbling I discover a new movement in my life.

To velcro the good...doesn't mean we deny the bad.  It doesn't have to be either or.  Rather, we up grade our hard wiring in our brain to make room, space, storage for God's grace to show up in many different ways. 

Pause with me...what was one good moment from this last week you would like to hold on to?
What was one bad moment that make should be like water off a duck's back...teflon it?

And I pray there is more than a trace of God's grace in the ways your soul response to those questions.

Blessings ~~