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It seems to me there are two universal truths in life:

1).  We don't like to hear the word, "No".  AND...

2).  The first word that falls from almost every toddler's mouth is, "No".

So it make sense to me that theologians and pastors spend a lot of time today trying to either work around times when God might say, "No" or trying to justify why God might say, "No."  In the former category, many Mainline Protestants spend so much energy trying to describe God as unconditional love that when something goes awry in people's lives we are sent into a theological tail spin.  On the other hand, other pastors are so sure that God says, "No" only because humans force God's hands.  They will contend laws we pass or legislation decisions limit God so all God can do is step back.  I have to confess I don't care for either explanation. 

I once read that we can make God out to be like a senile grandparent...that all we are interested in is God looking the other way at our brokenness, patting us on the head telling us we are great, and maybe giving us a quarter.  While that is one way to look at it, I also know lots of grandparents who are the primary caregivers in their family.  Grandparents who hold everyone accountable, but do so lovingly.  Grandparents who welcome family members into the spare bedroom when they did not pay their rent and got kicked out.  Grandparents who will say, "No," every bit as much as saying "Yes."  

I think God's unconditional love is wide enough for the moments "No" tumbles into my life.  The real question is, how am I going to respond to that?  Right now I am working through some place where things are not all rainbows and chocolate rivers.  I have bumped into more "Nos" that perhaps I care to count.  So, does that mean that God has abandoned me?  Does that mean that I have caused some kind of brokenness and this is punishment?  Does that mean that humans have the power to say "No" to each other and sometimes we make that out to be about God?  I don't always get my way.  Life is filled with mountains and valleys.  Yet, we worship God who proclaims to be there in the moments of euphoric "Yes" and emotionally difficult "No".  

Sometimes the "No" is also an invitation for me to look around my own life.  Sometimes I am not doing as great as my carefully guarded public persona likes to portray to the world.  Sometimes my actions are causing hurt that is awakening the "No" in the other person.  Sometimes "No" is just a fact of life.

Maybe that is why my kids both said "No" as their first word.  Maybe we say it first because we need to spend our whole life figuring out what to make of and how to respond to this one simple word.  And maybe we need to realize that "No" is not the absence of God, but a chance to fill the emptiness that word can create with the sacred.  Can we invite God into the "No" in our life?  Are we willing to sit with God in silence around that "No"?  And are we willing to be open to God who doesn't promise/guarantee to turn that "No" into a "Yes", but will grieve with you, sustain you, and help guide you to the path of life that is true life?

If so, there is MORE than a trace of grace in that.

Blessings ~