Forgiveness Part 4

 

“Forgiveness is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of another person's throat. Forgiveness does not create a relationship. Unless people speak the truth about what they have done and change their mind and behavior, a relationship of trust is not possible. When you forgive someone, you certainly release them from judgment, but without true change, no real relationship can be established.  Forgiveness in no way requires that you trust the one you forgive. But should they finally confess and repent, you will discover a miracle in your own heart that allows you to reach out and begin to build between you a bridge of reconciliation. Forgiveness does not excuse anything.  You may have to declare your forgiveness a hundred times the first day and the second day, but the third day will be less and each day after, until one day you will realize that you have forgiven completely. And then one day you will pray for his wholeness......”  ― William P. Young, The Shack

 

You have now read the above quote (or at least skimmed it) four times.  What sentence jumps off the screen/page for you?  Is it because that sentence sings the truth or because it feels like sandpaper to your soul?  Does the sentence confirm your thoughts or contradict what you know to be true?  Does the sentence fascinate or frustrate you?  I love the part of the quote that says forgiveness will not, by itself, create a relationship.  I can forgive, and the other person may never know it.  I can forgive, and it won’t make a difference to the other person.  I can forgive because I need to stop carrying around the weighted backpack of anger, hurt, and harm caused by another person or society’s words and actions.  Forgiveness offers release and relief from the ache in my soul.  Forgiveness for me is never one and done; there is no finish line, just slowly stopping to feed and fuel the hatred that burns in each of us toward others. 

 

Today, hold this quote, for it is, I promise, the last time I will share it.  I pray that the person you began to intentionally and prayerfully forgive on Monday is shifting and taking new shapes in your heart.  I pray you are finding ways to live in the mystery of forgiveness.  You may not be ready to trust that person yet.  Let this process be as unique for you as your fingerprint, because we know God’s forgiveness is offered unconditionally and unceasingly to us, day by day, hour by hour, as wisdom for our lives, individually and collectively.  Amen.